Meth

METH
For years, I never, ever thought that the trajectory of my life would bring me anywhere near Methamphetamines. I was a casual marijuana smoker for many years, and often dabbled in slightly harder drugs such as cocaine, ecstasy, acid and mushrooms. But, these drugs always struck me as acceptable drugs. They were substances that one on a certain side of the socio-economic divide could do without producing too much guilt and could even produce a kind of honor; to have said, yes, I have been there. A badge of honor? Not so sure about that, but definitely a boundary. It was experimentation and for the most part, coke, x, LSD, and ‘shrooms, are expensive drugs that I had the opportunity to recreationally use.
Nevertheless, what follows is a detailed description of my one experience with methamphetamines. Meth, as it is commonly known, is a very strong, long lasting drug. It is similar to cocaine in effect and symptom. In fact, without knowing or caring about the chemical effects of methamphetamines, I can say that the two drugs, those are cocaine and methamphetamines, are basically the same drug.
Upon ingesting meth through the nasal passage, one notices a sour chemical taste in the mouth and a thick “drip” as it is known begins to cascade down the esophagus. The effects are instantaneous, seemingly even faster than coke, if possible. One’s visual sense is immediately impaired. The air around one literally crackles as if the user can now detect minute traces of electricity in the air. This is one of the most fascinating aspects of the meth experience. This electric air, this charged atmosphere that one senses, is particularly acute.
Visual hallucinations, of a moderate degree, are also prevalent. One’s sense of color, shape and depth is quickly distorted so that there is a movement or rhythm to basically the entire visual environment; everything from room interiors to the streets outside is now tinged with the drug. Coupled with the electrical current mentioned above that the user has now tapped into, the two affects can be quite disorienting as well as immensely pleasurable. If one is emotionally prepared to become hostage to a powerful drug, then the effects can be harnessed and enjoyed. To physically move around is akin to swimming in a warm pool. Every movement of the limbs is soft and graceful at first, but quickly degenerates into a jerky nervousness. This is also similar to the cocaine experience when the initial euphoria begins to lessen and gives way to a more manic existence. Like with any drug though, including alcohol, if one’s mental state is in disorder prior to ingestion, the probability and likelihood of a negative and even harmful experience increases dramatically.
Physically, one’s extremities begin to tingle with a nervous or manic energy. The user begins to feel quite able bodied, strong, loose-limbed etc…One can run with ease and for extended periods of time, can drink alcohol or smoke pot, to little or no effect, and mentally can concentrate quite intensely on internal or external minutiae. But again, after the initial burst, a jerkiness soon begins to take hold that then radiates throughout the duration of the experience.
The major difference between meth and coke then becomes their duration. When the meth experience is fully underway, one understands that the drug they have ingested is much more powerful than cocaine. Unlike cocaine, which is mostly a heady mental experience, methamphetamines affect the body much more powerfully than does coke. The entire body quivers as the drug takes hold and refuses to let the user go for many hours. This high degree of effect remains for several hours, refusing to wane in strength, or “the drugs grip on you” for at least four to five hours after ingestion.
Unfortunately, here is where all the positive aspects of a meth experience end, because after the initial hours, which can be quite enjoyable, a more sinister side of the drug begins to emerge. The picture of meth in the wider culture is not altogether incomplete or inaccurate. In fact, the last hours of a meth experience are very much similar to the horror stories one routinely hears about in the press. Desperation and nervousness settle in and refuse to abate. One begins to think about scoring more drugs to return to the initial state of pleasure. This feeling is so acute because the difference between the two extremes in the time immediately after ingestion and the period several hours later is so immense. When one begins to settle into the last vestiges of the experience, the feeling is so terrible and empty compared to the feelings of pleasure and invincibility one had grown so accustomed to just a few short hours (though seemingly minutes) ago. It is here that we have users needing to score more. And unlike cocaine, where a user wants to score more just to feel great again, a meth user wants to score more just so that he feels less miserable. In essence, meth is like coke on overdrive. It usually takes a concerted effort to become a cocaine addict, many months and many thousands of dollars. But meth is addictive in 8 short hours.
If one is lucky enough NOT to score more methamphetamines, the last four or five hours of a meth experience will be extremely unpleasant. Sweating, nervousness, paranoia, downright nastiness, and even violence are some reactions that I have observed in my experiences. Depression and intense mental strain from varied swings of a meth experience also begin to take hold. The most one can hope for at this stage is to quietly and quickly move passed the drug and be free of it. I am convinced that the worst aspect of the meth experience is how quickly the drug turns on you. We hear horror stories of acid trips that turn violent and disturbing in short time, and obviously, heroin and other of the hardest drugs can kill one in no time flat, but for a medium to hard drug that probably will not kill you, meth has a truly terrible turnaround basically built into the drug. Meth addicts are notorious for taking the drug and then staying on the drug for hours, days, even weeks. To come into contact with a person (or more disturbingly, a couple) that has been on a meth binge is one of the more absurd things one can ever witness. Their skin is yellow and gray, they are almost constantly perspiring, as if their very pores were punishing their own skin for the assault, and of course, the manic and downright idiotic behaviors of a meth user are all fantastic (in the negative sense) to witness. I have seen my share and I can say without qualification that it is one of the reasons I limited my meth experiences to one.
As the final phase of the meth experience settles in, one begins to literally feel the drug’s grip lessen and ease, but for some reason, one feels very little relief. This is odd, because it is clear that the drugs “come-down” is so very unpleasant that one imagines that anything that signals the end of the experience would be very much welcomed. This was not so with my meth experience, and I attribute it to the sheer audacity of the drug’s effect. One is so disappointed by the decision to experience methamptamines, knowing full well the drug’s nature and reputation, that the knowledge that the experience will soon end brings little to no relief.
One of the most banal effects of a meth experience is also very telling. When the meth has finally worn off, usually after a fitful night’s sleep, the user notices that one’s skin has broken out with acne. But this is not ordinary acne, this is “meth acne.” Literally, this is whiteheads of acne that when popped ooze not the traditional whitehead but a yellow-tinged gelatin-like liquid. The smell of the liquid is terrible and basically the same smell as the methamphetamines one ingested just sixteen or eighteen hours previously.